Will Merkel’s origins are unknown. As a toddler, he was found wandering the waters near the remote Galapagos Islands. After joining a crew of fearsome pirates, he gave up his life of adventure to go to kindergarten. Although he had promise as a future leader, he had to leave schooling behind in order to go undercover in Bangladesh to help the CIA uncover a terrorist plot. Upon arrival, he abandoned his mission and joined a gypsy folk group that toured the Russian countryside. He returned to America on a paddleboat and has since then been disguising himself as an avid drinker in order to overthrow the leaders of Susie Drinks Dallas and use their resources to return to his unknown homeland.but for realsies …
Will is a proud graduate of the University of North Texas, and a skilled graphic designer. He has a knack for rebuilding, repairing and upgrading cars, most recently working on a ground-up restoration of a 1980 Corvette. When he’s not spending his time under the hood of a car or in front of his computer using his creative fuels, Will enjoys drinking fine whiskeys and providing the world with grade-A sarcasm and wit.